While on a routine patrol, our noble hero Banana-man, encountered a stash of illicit beauty supplies. He approached cautiously in case it was a trap. Instincts, luck, experience, call it what you will, saved the brave young crime fighter from a nefarious ensnarement. From a jumbo tube of daily exfoliating scrub exploded a cloud of metallic nano-howler monkeys. A blast of high-pitched howls, swinging nano-fists, and gnashing canines filled the still air. Banana-man leaped back with an alacrity that would have made his Capoeira master proud (had the beloved teacher not died at the hands of Banana-man's evil twin, Plantain-inator: see issue #423). As they drained the last of their factory installed batteries, one superior mini-mechanical monkey minion managed to misappropriate our man's mask and mangled it.There was no time to lose. Ripping the stainless steel tube from the vocal assembly of an attackers and a large Banana from his belt, Banana-man quickly constructed a new mask. As he worked he realized that this trap could only be the work of one evil genius: Avonica. Once an assistant manager of a small electronics store, she had been kidnapped by a roving gang of zealous pyramid-scheming entrepreneurs. Back in their secret laboratory, in a tragic experiment, she became what she was now -- a warped, evil creature of flashy, meaningless technology and hyper-feminine kitsch.
Though his secret identity had been cleverly maintained, Banana-man no longer had use of the most powerful weapon in his arsenal -- the Banana-rang. But there was no time to be concerned with that. In the distance, Banana-man heard the ringing yell of the innocent, beautiful brick layer caught up in Plantain-inator's plot. Although he could hear the dull thuds of masonry against skulls, he had to hurry, she didn't have an endless supply of ammunition. "Why? Why didn't she listen? She should have never followed me out here," he fumed. Then with an ironic laugh, he mused, "But then again, I always seem to attract the plucky ones."
